Random questions of life

Insomnia thoughts

I was an insomniac for more than 15 years.

The only way I was able to fall asleep was with my headphones and listening to a book, radio theater, or a podcast. 

It was something I got used to, the headphones helped most of the time so I always had a pair under my pillow. That is until we got a cat :)) In the last 4 months I changed 3 pairs. Apparently, she ate them while I was asleep :)).

Yesterday morning I found my last pair chewed and I have to wait a few days to order new ones. I will go for a wireless option this time, I really hope she will not damage them, again.

Anyway, this is not the point of the article. Last night I was really worried because I had no headphones and my husband made a joke: ”How about sleeping like a normal human, with your thoughts?”. It was a good joke, but also a bad one because it terrified me. Until now, I had so many thoughts, my anxiety used to get out of hand and I would just freak out, for hours, in the same position. This is what I expected for last night but I had an awesome surprise. 

Working with my traumas, listening to Dr.K, writing about what happened to me over time helped me let some pressure out and last night I slept quite ok. I fall asleep in a maximum of 30 minutes, with no loop thoughts, no overanalyzing random, useless situations.  I do not know if this will help someone with insomnia but I am really happy. I can finally sleep with my thoughts…until my new headphones come :))).

I will keep my routine with podcasts and books because I love to learn new stuff every day but now I know that when my cat eats my headphones, I still have the possibility to sleep. 

Mental health and trauma work are hard but worth it!

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